A client lately had the scare of her life when her companion of 22 years admitted to a 10 month affair with a coworker. He was fed up with “always being the maker and had decided to seek out an equal partner. The wife was tormented. She admitted she was warning by her parents “good girls by no earnings let on they want local sex – if they do, no one would want or love them”.
Contemporary single girls take their lead from women’s magazine that encourages them to looking sex for enjoyment. These create both good and bad news for guys. The good news is it’s a fabulous chance for predatory men who have sexual self-assurance. The bad news is it’s frightening for men who doubt their sexual ability.
The terrible news for fresh women is that they are automatic to want to fasten to the man they have sex with. No matter how at ease their left-brain or logical mind is, their right-brain or emotional side is prone to wake them up feeling sad the next morning. How do they get the liberty to have a good one night place without the sadness?
Here are two suggestions:
1. Mandy recommends kicking the guy out to go home before you go to sleep. That way you can wake up safely in your own bed next morning without the bad taste feeling. You can pretend it was all a dream and you definitely don’t have to hear him splutter and break wind in your toilet when all you want to do is get more “shut eye”.
2. Trish recommends you only choose guys you never want to see again. That way you won’t spend all next day wishing he would call you and say how the earth moved for him too and how anxious he is to see you again.
So what does the expert say about one night stand for men and women?
As a sex-therapist, I would urge you to be absolutely adamant that someone you just met should use a condom if you have sex. Have no view of a loving encounter during or no substance which warm afterwards. Since you may not even share the same values or backgrounds you will almost certainly be unsuited as long-term lovers.
If you are women, surely ask for what you want. It’s unlikely that he is going to care about your needs. If you are a man, don’t give her your phone number. You know you have no intelligence of contacting her again, so don’t give her false expect.
For everyone, do practice safe sex and follow Mandy’s example. Make sure they go home straight after the deed is done. Some folk who intended a one–night stand were stuck with a “squatter” who refused to move out!